tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-81260437374613152472024-03-12T16:24:32.379-07:0040 – Now What?The biggest shock in turning 40 has been the realization that I have to keep working for another 25 years. I thought this was the pinnacle. Now what do I do? This blog is my exploration of what I want to be when I grow up, for the second half of my life.Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.comBlogger110125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-74210623625410881332009-04-21T14:57:00.000-07:002009-04-21T15:13:24.886-07:00Ghost blogging taking up too much timeI know it's silly to have a blog then post nothing for a month or two except a self-pitying birthday note. I'm a sad little blogger.<br /><br />At least I am here. But I've been blogging my heart out elsewhere for a client, and it's been a strange experience.<br /><br />For my <a href="http://40-nowwhat.blogspot.com/2008/11/its-old-boys-club-but-i-dont-mind.html">part time job </a> (no, they haven't let me go yet), I've been writing blog entries for three months now. The association I work for is taking a stand as a third party in the election going on now in my province, and among our tactics is to host a blog and to twitter. And as the resident writer, I've been writing nearly all of it.<br /><br />At first it was just another writing assignment, one that required me to think against my own ideology. My name isn't anywhere on it, and just as well since my personal politics are <a href="http://40-nowwhat.blogspot.com/2008/11/ideological-differences-at-work-may-be.html">quite a bit left of my employer's</a>, so I could have fun with it. Still, my president read everything before I posted it and he notched up the right-wing rhetoric and/or the nastiness a bit every time. So one day I decided to do it his way and let him notch me down if needed. It was right around the time that the party we're against had a candidate make anti-Zionist comments, which offended me personally. And after that I had a small axe of my own to grind, and got a bit more nasty myself<br /><br />Anyhow, for the last while I've been having a great time blogging for them. I write pithy comments, find fun stuff to blog about or tweet, and have really loved the writing.<br /><br />One of the reasons for starting this blog was to air <a href="http://40-nowwhat.blogspot.com/2008/01/you-mean-i-have-to-work-another-25.html">my personal problems</a> in a public, yet semi-anonymous way, and to talk them out loud (in print). But it was also to become more familiar with the world of blogging. Clients of mine need me to explain these kinds of things like social media, so the better I understood them, the better I could do my job. And I've gained a lot of experience about what to do right (and even more about <a href="http://40-nowwhat.blogspot.com/2008/10/sheesh-two-weeks-since-i-posted.html">what to do wrong</a>). But blogging for my client these last few months, I've gained an even better understanding of how to blog.<br /><br />Now can I call myself a "<a href="http://www.chrisbrogan.com/what-i-want-a-social-media-expert-to-know/">social media expert</a>" too?Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-71808362892474269002009-03-18T12:46:00.000-07:002009-03-18T13:07:19.097-07:0041...and countingToday is my 41st birthday. And so far I'm not all that excited.<br /><br />Forty was a big year.I did the triathlon, I challenged my assumptions about work. I started blogging. We took a trip to celebrate. Things happened around my 40th birthday. But 41? Nada.<br /><br />Now, as I drift deeper into my 40s, birthdays are nothing special. I know, birthdays lost their luster sometime between 13 and 30, but either way, it doesn't seem worth bothering with a birthday anymore. I don't mind admitting my age, and am not suggesting that I'll hide it or start counting backwards or anything (don't laugh--I know several women who do just that once they get to 39!). But what's the point of this day itself anymore?<br /><br />My day so far? Well, for starters, I'm still sick. I have had the flu for six days, and while this is my third day without a fever, I'm still lethargic, low in appetite and coughing et al. So fun fun there. I woke up at the usual early hour of 7:01 when my younger son charged in to tell us the time and ask permission to go downstairs. No "happy birthday mommy" or hugs or anything. Then hubby rolled over to show me he woke up happy, but still no greeting. So I get up, shower, and come back to the room to get dressed. At last hubby remembers to say Happy Birthday. Woopie. I go down where younger son remembers and hugs and kisses ensue momentarily, but frankly I need to leave to catch my bus. Older son ignores me and says nothing right until I walk out the door. <br /><br />Lucky me today is an office day, so I start my work day with a meeting that piles on more work, where I firmly stick my foot in my mouth and later get chastised for it by my boss. Oh yeah, and for good measure he mentions that he is still unsure about working with me long term. Just when I was feeling mildly secure in my part time job. Not that he was being mean. I probably deserved it after the foot-in-mouth thing. I tell boss that he is taking up more of my time lately than agreed. He says figure it out -- stop doing some of my work. Not the answer I wanted (I wanted to bring in more help or be paid for more time). Not a great workday so far.<br /><br />I got an e-card from my father. What ever happened to paper cards or phone calls? I did get a card from the office gang, which was a surprise since I didn't think they knew when my birthday was, as I'm a contractor and never had to fill in employment forms. But they did, so I have one of those cute cards where everyone writes a few cute words. It's sweet, in a not-very-personal kind of way.<br /><br />And now I'm working the rest of the day here, feeling discontent with the job, worrying about all the other work I have to do this week when we're supposed to take the kids to Seattle tomorrow for a couple days of Spring Break. And feeling a bit sorry for myself that my birthday is such a non-event.<br /><br />So I think next year I will lower my expectations significantly. Getting a year older is fine, but expecting the birthday itself to be special is silly. It's an antiquated idea I've carried over from my childhood, and once I think it's time I outgrew. I am not 10, nor am I 30. Maybe at 50 I can step up expectations a bit, for the next eight years after today, I'll expect nearly nothing.<br /><br />And who knows, if the kids surprise me with a big dinner and cards and gifts (which I guess might still be waiting for me at home tonite), it will be even sweeter. <br /><br />I think that's the lesson I've learned in turning 41 -- lower expectations make it much easier to let life exceed expectations. Seems kinda sad for a birthday lesson, but I'm old now, I guess I'm allowed to wallow a bit, right?Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-19377580306163088472009-03-02T13:37:00.000-08:002009-03-02T13:54:32.004-08:00Reading resumesToday a colleague at my part time job asked me to read over some resumes that had come in for a position he's hiring. I had written the job description, and while the job is for an executive assistant, there is hope this person we hire will have some communications skills to back me up, at least in an administrative capacity. So he asked me to read the resumes, the stack I got having been already filtered once to weed out the chaff. And I found myself surprised all the same at the reasons I had for ranking people.<br /><br />It's funny what sticks out in a resume. One woman left a period off the end of her first paragraph. One girl's resume printed with really weird formatting. One lady wrote in what I think she thought was a witty style, but it came off as brash and self-important. Not a one of the resumes I saw mentioned the two software programs we listed as assets for the job. None mentioned that they had experience in the two industries our association works in, despite the assocation being clearly identified. <br /><br />I think the strangest thing to catch my eye, though, was how much I liked reading about their interests or extra-curricular activities. One lady was into drag racing. She had a really strong resume, but the drag racing just made her seem so interesting. She's getting an interview.<br /><br />For years as a freelancer I've heard about resume writing and how HR people look for anything to get one off the read-me pile -- anything to reject you -- but until I had to go through them today myself it hadn't really hit home. So here are a few tips from me:<br /><br />1. Write a targeted cover letter: Don't just regurgitate the job description, but do address the main points. Don't just tell me you're the ideal candidate -- show me why. We really do read the cover letters -- they are much more than window dressing.<br /><br />2. Proofread, spellcheck and PDF: The format and style of your resume does matter. Spelling mistakes are fatal, especially for a job description that includes admin work and proofreading. And bad formatting can ruin your chances, so always PDF the file you're sending to be sure it will print the way you want it to. We do print them out.<br /><br />3. Be interesting: Finding the right person is all about how they'll fit in, so tell the employer something about yourself that isn't in descriptions of previous jobs. What do you do with your spare time?<br /><br />4. Explain why you're job hunting: There's a recession on, so lots of people are looking for work. There's no shame in it, but you need to explain why you're looking. Want to go from part time to full time? Returning to work after a break? Bad fit at your last job? It's the same thing as meeting a great single person -- if you're such a great catch, why are you available?<br /><br />5. Show that you know something about the company you are applying to: If it's a small office, say why a small office suits you. If it's in a particular industry, show that either you know the industry or that you're able to get up to speed quickly. Read the company's website, even if it's an admin job. It will give you the edge.<br /><br />I hope we find the right candidate here. I can't say any of the ones I read today struck me as the ideal person, but interviews should help us figure that out.Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-67855597855415937712009-02-18T11:58:00.000-08:002009-02-18T12:10:07.274-08:00I dropped a ballAs a working mom, and more importantly I think, as a working freelancer, I am constantly juggling dozens of balls at any time. I have many clients, and have to keep all their issues in my head, all their tasks on my to-do lists (and I must have to-do lists!), and I have to remember to account for my time and bill and so on.<br /><br />As a mom, I have to keep track of everyone's schedules, book lessons and playdates, sitters and daycares, summer camps and carpet cleaners, and so on.I live my life by the watch and the calendar, constantly trying to get everything done on time, kids to bed at the right moment, dinner served right at six, and so on.<br /><br />It's a seriously difficult juggling act. And this week I dropped a ball.<br /><br />I missed a key deadline. Not for a client, but for my son. I missed the Thursday deadline to sign him up for little league this Spring. And because I was two days late getting the application in, the league we've played in for two years (and I mean "we", since I've been coaching his team all this time), the one we really felt a part of, the one his closest friends play in, the sport he loves above all others, says they won't let him play this year. Somehow, if I'd gotten the application in on Thursday, they'd have had a place for him, but by Saturday, they didn't.<br /><br />Now, it's not as dire as it sounds, because the league in the next neighborhood over from us is not as uptight as our old league about living within their boundaries, and their registration deadline was Sunday, and he will know a few kids from school who play in that league, and it's not that far from where we live. And they guaranteed him a spot. So he'll play there, and I will coach.<br /><br />But of course both he and I are very upset about our old league. They had really made us feel a part of the community, of the little league association, or something important. And for two days, they've tossed us to the curb (and I begged, all weekend, but their exact words were "We're full. He's on the waiting list, but don't hold your breath."). I feel like I've been duped this past two years into belonging to something to which I never really mattered. <br /><br />And we'll have to go back to the first league next year or the year after, because the in-boundary thing matters the older the kids get and the better they play (for all stars, etc.). But I won't coach for them again. I've been burned.<br /><br />Anyhow, this bad thing happened, along with all the bad feelings, because I dropped a ball. I forgot about the deadline.<br /><br />My son has forgiven me, but I haven't. I went out yesterday and bought a new wipe-off calendar for the fridge, with colour coded markers to write down everyone's schedules. And I held my first family meeting, telling everyone to take responsibility for their own schedules, and stop expecting me to remind you every day of swimming lessons and vet appointments.<br /><br />I don't know how long the new system will work, especially because my husband hasn't bought into it. But at least it makes me feel like maybe I don't have to juggle everything alone.<br /><br />Still, I dropped an important ball, and can't let that happen again.Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-14059236757083589202009-02-16T10:33:00.000-08:002009-02-16T10:33:58.761-08:00What generation are my kids?Via <a href="http://genxpert.blogspot.com/">GenXpert</a>, I found another Gen X blogger, <a href="http://www.thegenxfiles.com">The Gen X Files</a>, which led me to an interesting thought. Dave who writes this blog is a Gen Xer, and has a couple of kids, the younger of whom is 8, about the same age as my older son. And Dave says his kids are Millenials, or Gen Y. But are they?<br /><br />I know we like to put labels on everything, to put people into convenient boxes so we can classify them, clarify them, and of course market to them. And that works to some degree, but sometimes we draw the box too broadly.<br /><br />Take the boomers. They've been defined as the children of the post-war generation who came of age in the 60s and 70s. Who are now entering the last decade or so of work, starting to be grandparents, etc. I loved the label Generation X when <a href="en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Douglas_Coupland ">Douglas Copeland</a> first defined it. We were the gap generation, not the boomers, not the children of boomers. Our parents were born during World War Two. We came of age in the 80s, and entered the work world right when all the boomers swelled the ranks and left no openings, when bad times hit the economy and our hopes of life-long employers like our parents had had was a wasted dream. <br /><br />The generation right after us, the echo boom, Gen Y, Millenials, or whatever name they go by, had it better. Their parents hovered, sheltered, and made life easier for them (which is in no way to be interpreted as a swipe at our parents, who did a fine job!). Because they were numerous where Gen X was few, they were a desired audience, so media paid attention to them in spades, as did marketers. They grew up in a more digital world, with video games, home computers, and ubiquitous cell phones and internet. They wouldn't know how to dial a rotary phone, load the paper in a typewriter, or maybe even crank the film forward in a camera.<br /><br />Right. That's us, that's them. But what about my kids? They are the children of Gen Xers through and through, born at the beginning of the 2000s (does that decade have a name yet?). They are growing up in the shadow of Gen Y, although that shadow is nowhere near as suffocating as the boomers' shadow under which I grew up. Are they a generation of their own, or will they be lumped in with the group 15-20 years older than them? What do we know about my children's generation? <br /><br />Wikipedia <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Generation_Y">defines Gen Y</a> as born right up to 2000. My son was born in 2001. Some have called this group <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Generation_Z">Generation Z</a> (we're going to run out of letters soon!). Another Wikipedia article says Generation Z starts with those born after 1997 (although the same article as says those born after 1991). <br /><br />While my googling is hardly extensive research, I think it helps prove my point that whatever generation and whatever their defining characteristics come to define my children, they are not Gen Y. I hope their generation gets what ours lacked -- enough numbers to have advantages but small enough to not lose out in the workplace.Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-55760543436703273792009-02-11T15:00:00.000-08:002009-02-11T15:08:49.135-08:00Being without a job is new to Gen YI have spent most of my career being between jobs. Of course, I've been basically freelancing for the last dozen years, so <a href="http://40-nowwhat.blogspot.com/2008/01/keeping-focused-on-career-exploration.html">that's to be expected</a>. But it's also a function of my generation.<br /><br />I entered the work force around 1990, when a recession was underway (nothing like this one, which is global, but still there were no jobs) and full time jobs were unheard of for the average university grad. My parents worked for the same employers most of their working lives, but I came to work not expecting to stay anywhere for too long. Luckily I managed to cobble together a career out of it, but being without work was a pretty common thing for me.<br /><br />So I pity the newly unemployed Gen Ys, especially those just starting to buy homes and start families. Because they've spent their entire working careers in a labour environment where they could call all the shots, ask for the moon and get it. And now this, where they may not be able to find any work, or at least any work above serving coffee at Starbucks (or are they laying off too?).<br /><br />Okay, maybe pity isn't the first word I would have used there. I'm a typical Gen Xer -- <a href="http://www.news.com.au/business/money/story/0,25479,24593071-14327,00.html">bitter</a> about the raw hand demographics and timing have dealt me, so part of me can't help but smirk, maybe even chuckle, at this situation Gen Yers are now in, because it's about time they felt my pain.<br /><br />But then today I read <a href="http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/02/10/how-to-talk-to-a-friend-whos-been-laid-off/">Penelope Trunk's column</a> on what to say to someone who'd been laid off, and her straightforward, make-it-easier-on-them advice kind of shamed me. So now it's more like pity.<br /><br />And in that case, I offer some advice. You'll get through it, you'll still manage in the long run, and people like me are here to help if we can.Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-15651891599521581812009-02-09T14:26:00.000-08:002009-02-09T14:38:26.830-08:00Twitter -- is there a point?A friend and colleague dragged me into <a href="http://www.twitter.com">Twitter </a>last week, and while I've now got <a href="http://twitter.com/carlashore">20 followers</a> and have posted a bunch of stuff, I'm not sure I see the point yet. So people are pointing me to some links. Don't they have jobs to do that make these constant posts difficult? Isn't hearing from them once or even twice a day on <a href="http://www.facebook.com">Facebook </a>enough?<br /><br />What can you do on Twitter that you can't do on <a href="http://www.facebook.com">Facebook </a>or email? How can it have any effect on my business or even my life? I can see how mundane it can be to see what everyone had for breakfast, but is it any less mundane to know what a blogger friend is working on before she posts to her blog? <br /><br />I'm still waiting to see why I'd need this. In the meantime, I'll go tweet something terribly profound. Like how the <a href="http://www.katkam.ca/">sun is shining in Vancouver</a> today.Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-20711857766493408052009-02-05T11:35:00.001-08:002009-02-05T11:40:27.558-08:00No job? Join the armyVia <a href="http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/02/03/dont-try-to-dodge-the-recession-with-grad-school/#more-2071">Penelope Trunk</a>, I found a link to an article from a couple months back that says that the <a href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/11/28/AR2008112802653.html?hpid=topnews">recession is driving up enrollment in the US military</a>. I suppose it makes sense. When the jobs disappear in this economy, rich 20-somethings will go back to university, and poor Gen Ys will enlist. Seems like a reasonable idea, unless there were a war on. Oh wait, there is a war on. Two in the US, last I looked.<br /><br /><blockquote>In some cases, the peace of mind that comes with good benefits and a regular paycheck is overcoming concerns about the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, which any new enlistee is likely to join. </blockquote><br /><br />Doesn't seem fair that poorer Americans are forced into this kind of choice.Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-83305592395398801452009-02-02T15:34:00.000-08:002009-02-02T15:37:53.697-08:00Haven't posted for a while now...I have become one of those people who has a blog but doesn't write on it. I guess I thought no one was listening, and got a bit tired of writing to myself. But maybe that's the point. If I write to myself, maybe others will come.<br /><br />So I'm posting today, and will try to do it more often.<br /><br />Of course, today's not the best day for this for me. I'm annoyed with my kids, my work, my clients, etc. I'm in a funk. You know, one of those moods where nothing in particular is wrong but you're upset anyhow, where you feel a bit angry but are not really sure at what. Where you have the vague sense that tears are close to the surface but there's nothing going on in particular that makes you want to cry.<br /><br />That mood. Maybe it's hormones. After all, 41 is just around the corner, and I hear pre-menopause can start anytime now. Or maybe it's a general sense of dread because after my first mammogram last month, they want me to come in for a follow-up mammogram tomorrow. They're very reassuring -- it happens all the time, could be nothing -- but still I worry.<br /><br />Or maybe that's not it. Maybe I'm just in a mood. But hey, I wrote about it. Anyone reading?Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-61688581503264988082009-01-07T13:02:00.000-08:002009-01-07T13:15:41.610-08:00Back to work in a big wayAs a freelancer, there are busy times and slow times. I used to think I could predict the slow times. Summers were slow, so anything from late May to late August was slow. Christmas is a slow time, and anything after December 1 until January 5ish was slow.<br /><br />There are exceptions. Some years I've had immensely busy summers. Well, one year. And a few times I had busy Christmas seasons, since I don't celebrate Christmas and agreed to work through the holiday time. But generally, these rules hold true.<br /><br />When work is generally steady and busy, the slow times are a luxury. You can take it easy, enjoy the chance to shop, hang out, meet people for coffee, network, even spend time with the kids. And not worry about work, since things will pick up soon. Some lucky years I even had projects lined up to start in September or January, so I didn't have to worry about the slow times at all.<br /><br />Of course, when things haven't gone terribly well in what ought to be the busy months, slow times are very tough. You can't enjoy the quiet because you're freaking out about when the next thing will come through.<br /><br />Lucky enough (and surprisingly, given the general "freak out" about the bad economy), this is one of the enjoy-the-slow-season years. Summer was pretty calm, and I knew by late July that I'd have this part-time job coming in September, which guaranteed me a decent income and enough work to see me through. So I enjoyed the summer, took it easy, and spent time with my kids. Still, I was pretty grateful for school to start up again and them to head back out of my house and me to knuckle back down.<br /><br />And now I have just finished a couple quiet weeks over Christmas, knowing that I still have the part time job for now, and that another contract was starting up this week. So I did take it easy over the break. It helped that I was snowed in a lot of the last two weeks and had little choice about going anywhere. But I actually enjoyed hanging out at home, seeing more of my kids (that's a first for me!), and taking it easy. I did have some work, and even came into the office for one day. But mostly it was quiet.<br /><br />But all that changed this week. The new contract did come through and I have to kick it into high gear starting now. And the job is still here, and after a sit down with the President this morning, I've got a huge to-do list. Plus the project I did slowly over the holidays is back for revisions, which I must do this week.<br /><br />Suddenly I'm in busy mode again. But for the first time, I'm finding it hard to get my ass in gear and put my nose to the grindstone (did I just mix metaphors?). I want to go back to the lazy mornings and easy days. I want to take it easy and not carry around the mental stress of all the work I have to do.<br /><br />Alas, such is the life of a freelancer. Busy is good, because busy means income. So I'm supposed to be happy about this stage.<br /><br />The only silver lining for me this week is that we're going on vacation next week. Six days till sun and sand. And all my clients know I'm going, and are working around me. Of course, such is also the lot of a freelancer. To take time off, I have to work extra hard before I go, keep on top of emails while I'm gone, then work extra hard when I return. But hopefully, I'll leave the mental stress behind and enjoy the beach.<br /><br />Of course, we're taking the kids, so it's not like I can leave ALL the stress behind. ;-)Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-85930802486506170772009-01-02T09:59:00.000-08:002009-01-02T10:05:17.314-08:00Recession will be tough for Gen YThis isn't my first recession. I believe my career was defined in large part by the lack of work that came out of the last recession in the 90s, just when I finished school. So this doesn't scare me as much as it might some of the newer workers whose entire careers have been focused around their wants and needs. And part of me can't help but gloat a bit about that.<br /><br />This Dilbert cartoon really sums it up:<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://dilbert.com/dyn/str_strip/000000000/00000000/0000000/000000/30000/7000/300/37302/37302.strip.gif"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 640px; height: 199px;" src="http://dilbert.com/dyn/str_strip/000000000/00000000/0000000/000000/30000/7000/300/37302/37302.strip.gif" border="0" alt="" /></a>Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-87894805913665097622008-12-29T13:33:00.000-08:002008-12-29T13:42:19.199-08:00My perfect latkesYesterday I fullfilled a year's worth of social obligations by hosting an open house for Chanukah. We had more than 40 people in our teeny house, with kids running mad in the back half and grownups sipping mulled wine and nibbling food in the front half. I love that about my house -- the playroom is separate from the living room and parties always break out this way.<br /><br />I served my famous latkes -- famous mainly because few of our friends are Jewish or if they are, no one bakes them like I do. I don't really have my own recipe -- I fake most of the quanities, but I do have a secret. And since I ought to post something today, here's my recipe, which I'm now writing out for the first time:<br /><br />5 lbs of potatoes (or if you have big plans like my party, double or triple this!)<br />1 medium onion<br />3 tbsp flour<br />2 eggs<br />1-2 tsp salt<br />1/2-1 tsp pepper<br />Lots of oil<br /><br />Peel potatoes. Rest wrists, and whatever you do, don't try to bowl that night (lesson learned the hard way while husband gloated). Peel onion and chop in half.<br /><br />Using food processor (unless you are masochistic!), grate potatoes and onions in batches. Change to main blade in food processor. Process shredded stuff in batches with a short burst, 20 seconds or so, to make mixture less stringy. Using hands, then squeeze out all the liquid handful by handful. Rest hands again. Get wrist massage if possible (not in my house, but maybe your partner is more into this than mine).<br /><br />Add flour, egg, salt and pepper to mixture. Heat oil in frying pan over medium heat. Using large spoon, drop latke-sized amount of batter onto frying pan. When brown edges appear, flip latkes until golden brown on both sides. Remove from pan to paper towel (to absorb a lot of the oil -- don't want them greasy!).<br /><br />Serve hot, with sour cream and/or apple sauce.<br /><br />There, family secret recipe revealed. The trick is the second run through the food processor, and of course squeezing out the potato liquid.<br /><br />Happy Chanukah!<br /><br />CarlaCarla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-46286582838497620562008-12-22T15:48:00.000-08:002008-12-22T15:51:09.430-08:00Who gets the last word in emails?I'm in PR , and today I pitched a story to a reporter who writes for my local daily and who also has a blog. She bit and wrote back, so I sent her a document, and later she emailed to tell me she posted it on her blog, so I wrote back to say thanks and happy holidays, and she wrote back to say me too. <br /><br />I've stopped the back and forth now, but who should have the last word, and when do you stop thanking someone for an email greeting?<br /><br />This happens a lot, when you send someone something, they write thanks, do you write back that they're welcome and so on? Is it rude not to answer every email? But if it is, when is it okay to stop replying? There must be an etiquette guide for this kind of thing.<br /><br />Anyhow, happy Hanukkah and Christmas to you all. Maybe I'll get lots of comments now wishing me the same back, so I'll comment back to them, and so on, and so on.....Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-87956220310740925732008-12-17T13:03:00.000-08:002008-12-17T13:26:05.384-08:00The morning commuteNormally when I have to come to my part time job, I bus. It's clear across town from my home, and I always suspected that the drive would be not much shorter than the bus ride, so why waste the gas, I thought, and why not sit and read. Of course, I spend a couple hours each work day just getting here and home, but I'm reading a lot of books.<br /><br />Anyhow, earlier this week my office had a holiday potluck, so I needed to bring in food (I made <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Latkes">latkes</a>, potato pancakes we eat at Chanukah, a secret Santa gift (lucky me, even though I have a pedicure set at home I'm anxious to regift to someone, I drew a man about whom I knew nothing), and some clothes my kids had outgrown that I was passing on to someone here. So I drove. Of course, the one day I chose to drive turned out to be two days after we sold our second car and became a one-car family. It also turned out to be the day after <a href="http://www.seevancouversnow.com/">Vancouver's first snow</a> of the year. Do I pick 'em or what?<br /><br />Anyhow, my loving husband, who of course believes he knows significantly more about driving than me (I admit he knows more about cars, but not about how to drive!), recommended a particular route to traverse the city eastward, and silly me, I listened to him. It turned out to be an incredibly slow-moving route, and it took me more than an hour to arrive at the office (the bus takes about 55 minutes door to door). Still, the driving wasn't too bad, roads were okay, and I picked my own route home and it was only 40 minutes.<br /><br />And loving husband survived just fine without the car for the day. He got the kids to school, walked to the grocery store, etc. Good thing he didn't have to go to work that day though. And today I'm back on my bus -- thank goodness because first off, I missed my book time (I'm reading the <a href="www.amazon.ca/Playing-Pizza-Novel-John-Grisham/dp/0385525001">John Grisham football novel</a> now) and because it's <a href="http://www.seevancouversnow.com/">snowing</a> again, and much harder today. No point in taking my chances in a car when I can leave it to the bus driver to figure out how to drive up the hill. <br /><br />Of course, it's still snowing as the day goes on, and this city doesn't cope well with snow, so I expect the commute home to be nuts. At least I'll have my book!Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-81746459392275465602008-12-10T14:28:00.000-08:002008-12-10T14:34:50.513-08:00The office Christmas partyLast night was my new office's Christmas, I mean Holiday party. Calling it a holiday party is silly -- it was all about Christmas, even though at least five of us don't celebrate Christmas. Whatever.<br /><br />Anyhow, it was the first office party I've had to attend in many, many years, and the first my hubby had to be dragged to in many years. Mr. unsociable had the advantage though, since I agreed to be designated driver and he got to drink. I was pretty worried about the party -- I don't know these people very well, and I don't want to make the wrong impression. But at the same time, I wanted to appear sociable and fit in.<br /><br />We were on a boat cruise, which while pleasant enough means there is no leaving early. We ended up at a table with people I didn't know, but older people (our office joined with another association for the party) and not the young'uns that make up most of my co-workers. Still, there was lots of mingling and mixing through the night, and I think I managed to convey just the right image in the end.<br /><br />I didn't get out on the dance floor with the dozen young'uns and boyfriends, so I avoided looking like an old fogey trying to fit in. But we did a lot of schmoozing and chatting and got to know some people a bit better (especially the guy I have to buy a secret santa gift for). I had a fine time, but I can't say it was fabulous. <br /><br />Of course, hubby became semi-social and had probably a better time than me. But then again, he was drinking. ;-)Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-3061131574324661482008-12-04T15:29:00.000-08:002008-12-04T15:36:13.190-08:00Why Gen Xers like me won't have retirement partiesLast night, I went to a retirement party for my favourite client. I'm very dissapointed to be losing this man as my client (I don't know if his replacement will keep working with me or not), but I am also sad to lose regular contact with him as he enters the retiree world.<br /><br />So I stayed for hte whole party, including all the speeches. He has had a 39 career in the federal public service, so there were a lot of stories about old collegues (none of whom I know) and previous positions (I've only known him for three years). It was all a bit dull for me, but it made me think about what a retirement party for me or someone like me would be like.<br /><br />And I realized that it wouldn't. I couldn't have a party with people there that had worked with me my whole career. I haven't stayed put anywhere long enough for that to happen, and I don't forsee that happening at any point in the rest of my career either.<br /><br />A job for life is something the baby boomers had, but it's not something most Gen Xers have, nor is it at all something the generations following us will have. Does this mean retirement parties like my client's are soon to be a thing of the past? What will a retirement look like in twenty years? No gold watch, but will there be people to celebrate the end of work with, or will it just be a winding down and closing of doors.<br /><br />Hmmmm....Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-2576369404573082842008-11-29T07:56:00.000-08:002008-11-29T08:09:05.815-08:00Buy Nothing DayToday is <a href="http://www.adbusters.org/campaigns/bnd">Buy Nothing Day</a> around the world. It was yesterday in the US, the biggest shopping day of the year being the Friday after American Thanksgiving. And since the economy is in the toilet, you'd think this would be an easy day to get behind.<br /><br />I was all for it. I wrote up Buy Nothing Day yesterday in my email newsletter to 1200 moms (a weekly output of my <a href="http://40-nowwhat.blogspot.com/2008/10/wanna-buy-my-side-business.html">side business</a> encouraging them to take part. And I planned my shopping yesterday so I could get it all bought the day before.<br /><br />So much for my plans. Yes, I bought fruit and veggies yesterday, but turns out we're out of eggs and milk, so I'll have to get some groceries today.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhylUlwMfUOYWGnq1BdMekEycqwVe8L0z51AdJHkHupng8G0xnbij3DoF54_dgg7H4kdyjJY6NiU0oHSgP4ga9bA7jBIT8pFImZED5QedcVP-jQ1NSo6No9BVdmvbhdlALtZpvovrPH99k/s1600-h/images.jpeg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 104px; height: 100px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhylUlwMfUOYWGnq1BdMekEycqwVe8L0z51AdJHkHupng8G0xnbij3DoF54_dgg7H4kdyjJY6NiU0oHSgP4ga9bA7jBIT8pFImZED5QedcVP-jQ1NSo6No9BVdmvbhdlALtZpvovrPH99k/s200/images.jpeg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274112059346399538" /></a>And I bought my son new runners yesterday (third pair in three months! I don't know how he manages it.), but forgot to repair the zipper on my other kid's jacket, so I have to go pay for that today too. Plus one of my kids is "desperate" for a pencil sharpener. That makes three stores I have to go to today.<br /><br />Ah well, at least my heart is in the right place. I think it's a might unfair to expect a working mom to buy nothing on a Saturday. Maybe on a Tuesday next year?Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-79406926025984101272008-11-21T09:08:00.000-08:002008-11-21T09:34:11.737-08:00Thinking back to the last year of high school as party prepLast weekend, some friends invited us to a house party. Yes, an honest-to-goodness <a href="http://www.cbc.ca/arts/tv/story/2008/11/13/house-party.html?ref=rss">house party</a>, with chips and dip, a few kegs and even California Coolers. How do they get away with being grownups and throwing this high-school level party? They gave it a theme.<br /><br />The theme here was wear what you wore your last year in high school (it was originally wear what you wore when you graduated, but it soon came to light that not everyone graduated in the traditional way, so they changed the theme). I graduated high school in <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1985">1985</a> (yes, if you're doing the math, that does mean I finished a year early. Smartie-pants here skipped fourth grade [social suicide by the way, but that's a whole other post. In fact, I think it's probably a whole other blog!]), so I searched for 80s clothes, and found myself tripping back to the early days.<br /><br />Am I nostalgic for high school? Not in the least. It was nice to be young and not have ripples where my tummy used to be, but otherwise high school was not a happy-go-lucky time (see above re: social suicide). But I liked the clothes and styles when I was living in the 80s. Somehow they seemed fun and flattering. Of course now, with my retrospective eyesight, they look goofy and outdated. But boy, was it fun to dig out the leg warmers (no, I didn't wear them) and the shoulder pads (yes, I did).<br /><br />I discovered that I actually had got rid of most of my 80s clothes. I thought I'd kept more, but being married to a man who tosses thing out as a hobby, it's hard to be a hoarder forever. But I did have <a href="http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20070909102026AAXHDZj ">skinny-legged jeans</a> (not from back then -- the chances of my fitting jeans from then was so out-of-this-world -- heck, the chances of fitting jeans from before my babies were born is just as remote!), and I have a lovely blouse with huge <a href="www.fashion-era.com/power_dressing.htm">shoulder pads</a> (why haven't I tossed that yet I don't know!), So I tucked my blouse into my pants and pulled it out so it ruffled over my pants. Then I added a great scarf that has come back into style so-I'm-told, but one I remember wearing in a song competition in grade 11. And I found penny loafers in the back of the closet.<br /><br />But the most fun part was the hair. I hated my curly hair in high school, and used to blow it dry so it turned out fluffy instead of curly. It gave the effect of big hair, which of course we wanted then. So I styled my <a href="http://80srewind.net/80s/80shairstyles.htm">80s hair,</a> added a bow, and I think I achieved the perfect look.<br /><br />The real downer came when I got to the party. Because besides my husband, for most of the party, I was the oldest person there, and in this case we were wearing it on our sleeves (literally for all those 90s grads wearing their lettermen jackets from their private schools). Eventually a few 80s grads showed up, but the whole thing left me feeling:<br /><br />a) old<br />b) glad it's not the 80s anymore<br />and <br /><br />c) nostalgic for <a href="http://www.kidzworld.com/article/4632-90s-fashion-trends">90s styles.</a> <br /><br />And no, I didn't take a photo of myself dressed up, sorry.Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-89499509354688138572008-11-20T10:48:00.000-08:002008-11-20T11:02:36.399-08:00Ideological differences at work may be a problemThis part time job I've taken may not be the answer to all my problems after all. While I like the work and am growing more comfortable with the hours, I think my President isn't the kind of guy who can be comfortable with a telecommuting communications director. He's made a few comments lately that have me questioning how long he'll put up with the part time thing. He's from the old school, where everyone who worked for him served him, so despite being a nice guy, he likes being able to walk down the hall whenever he's in the office (which is less than half time in my experience so far) to ask a question, and is less comfortable with phone or email for that kind of thing.<br /><br />So I'm starting to wonder if the solution for this company is really me, or if they really want a full timer. And now that the economy has tanked, even in our Olympic city, the job market has likely changed enough for him to find a full timer that meets his needs.<br /><br />Then there's the ideological differences between us. I am generally a progressive, liberal thinker. I work for environmental causes, support all thing sustainable and generally lean away from conservatism. But this association is all about conservative, pro-business, anti-labour etc. While not every issue challenges my morals -- so far the biggest issue that might I'm okay with -- I can't see me doing this full time or long term when I don't agree with their ideology. And frankly, I think the President sees that too.<br /><br />It's not that anyone has told me it's even close to over. I think we all think it's too soon to judge. And the personality fit so far is okay. I just think it's starting to come to light this week that my ideal work situation and their ideal communications situation may not be aligned in the long term.<br /><br />So now what? Do I restart the blog as 41-now what? I'm a bit down about it all today. While I'm growing comfortable with the job, I'm also realizing that it won't last. So I'm back to the big question of what will I be when I grow up. And I have more questions now than answers. Plus, a year later my economic options are more limited than they were last year, which in itself raises more issues.<br /><br />Perhaps I'll go back to my list of women in my field with more experience than me and restart my <a href="http://40-nowwhat.blogspot.com/2008/04/part-time-job-options.html">conversations</a> with them, in order to gain more perspective and more clarity. The job isn't going anywhere in the next month or two, so I have a bit of a cushion to sort it out.<br /><br />Or maybe I'll change my mind and decide this is the job situation for me, or even the employer for me. Or maybe they'll decide they like the challenge my ideals bring to their way of thinking, that having me around keeps them from "drinking their own bathwater" and offers an alternative point of view. Maybe they like what I have to offer skills-wise so much they work around my part time status.<br /><br />Maybe... or maybe not...Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-56287351436461302162008-11-17T14:54:00.000-08:002008-11-17T15:04:20.417-08:00Technology comfort and the generationsMy baby boomer client today showed his ignorance and disinterest in all things new technology.<br /><br />We were discussing how he can have more face-time (don't you hate that buzzword?!) with me even if I'm not in his office, and I suggested we can set up webcams and do regular conference calls, and he waved his hand dismissively and said "Carla, I'm too old for that kind of high tech stuff." He's only in his early 50s, but really has no clue. I'm seeing the generational technology gap first hand right here.<br /><br />All the 20-somethings in the office spend a bit of time every day on their Facebook pages. So do the 30-somethings, and I admit to checking mine fairly regularly too. But this guy barely knows what Facebook is. He didn't know what Twitter was until he read an article in the weekend newspaper. He was shocked to learn about Blackberry Messenger today, even though he's had a crackberry for years and years. I can't wait until I bridge the idea of a podcast to him next month.<br /><br />I think the nicest thing about working for him is that even at 40, he makes me feel so young. ;-)Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-81738111640442715002008-11-11T08:05:00.000-08:002008-11-11T08:05:00.832-08:00Grey hair -- to colour or not to colour, my child asks the questionI have grey hair. In fact, I have many grey hairs. I also have many more dark brown ones, so overall my hair doesn't look very grey. But they're there, and they are quite visible.<br /><br />As my son pointed out last night. We were sitting around the dinner table and he leans toward me, points towards the part in my hair at the scalp, and says "Gee mommy, you have a bunch of grey hair. Why don't you dye it?"<br /><br />Good question, but still, who wants their grey hair pointed out? <br /><br />I have dyed my hair before. Three times, to be exact, unless you count that time in high school when my sister and I did home highlights that turned the tips of my hair kind of burgandy in colour). I am not one to colour her hair. I've always liked my dark, full brown head of hair, and have always been one for the natural look. But last year when I turned 39, my hairdresser talked me into doing a colour. So I dyed out all the grey, and while I got a few compliments, mostly no one noticed. And no one said anything when the colour faded and the grey grew back in. I dyed it two more times this past year -- well, I turned 40 after all!! But they dye is growing out and the grey is growing in, and now someone has noticed.<br /><br />Should I keep dying my hair to hide the grey? I guess I look younger without the grey, but I know I don't look 40, so does it matter? Should I stay a staunch advocate of the natural look, or use what humanity invented and hide the ravages of age?<br /><br />Should I let my seven year old decide this for me?Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-30731950078030680752008-11-10T12:58:00.000-08:002008-11-10T13:05:48.914-08:00I'm an asset now that my childbearing years are overWhen I was in discussions for my part time job, one of the guys said they liked the fact that I'm done having kids, since I won't be taking any more maternity leaves on their employ. At the time I didn't think much of it, but now that I'm here, I see his point.<br /><br />I look around this office of about 20 people and there are about 10 women here who are expected to have a baby sometime in the next five years. Seriously. Imagine the turmoil when that starts happening! <br /><br />The work here, outside of management jobs like mine and a few others, is mainly administrative, so there are a lot of women here between 25-35. A bunch of them are married, young, and three just bought their first homes last month. Three! They've all talked about "when I have kids" so you know it's on their minds.<br /><br />So here we have it, another reason why a Gen Xer is an asset to a workplace -- my childbearing years are behind me! (and before you flame me telling me that women in their 40s have kids a lot, I know that, but I personally am done with having babies, and find that most women of 40 are also putting those years behind them.)<br /><br />I wonder if Gen Y will be very different parents than us, especially when it comes to work-life balance? HmmmmmCarla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-64297208502584700262008-11-03T14:04:00.000-08:002008-11-03T14:12:39.308-08:00It's an old boys club -- but I don't mindMy part time job is for a construction assocation, so it should come as little surprise that there are a lot of 'good old boys' around here. Not really on staff, because most of the work is administrative, which means that most of our staff are under 30 and ethnically diverse. But the background players, the power brokers, and the president and vice, the two staff with whom I interact the most, are definately in the 'old boys' vein.<br /><br />There's a lot of swearing, and not a lot of genteel language when we three sit down to chat, which seems to be most workdays that I'm in the office.<br /><br />But I find I don't mind. And I find that fact surprising. I've spent most of my career dealing with language, and I actually find it pretty refreshing to be able to use four letter words, in context only, when I want to. And there's nothing degrading or derogatory in the banter with these guys. If anything, it's honest and respectful, in a sometimes joking kind of way.<br /><br />I think the reason I'm comfortable with the environment is that it doesn't feel exclusionary -- I fit in when we talk in that manner. And the fact that they include me in their usual manner, makes me feel more a part of things here. Whodathunk I'd be happy about an old boys style of work?Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-57353901622030233672008-10-27T14:49:00.000-07:002008-10-27T14:51:11.018-07:00Cake in the workplaceToday is an office day, so I'm at the client's, and I can't get over how much cake there is. Between meeting left overs, staff birthdays, and other stuff, people bring in a lot of cake.<br /><br />Today alone, there was a box of donut holes to celebrate one twentysomething's birthday, leftover muffins from a morning meeting, and half a Costco cake one person brought in because it was left over from her kid's birthday party yesterday.<br /><br />This office thing is not good for my waistline!Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8126043737461315247.post-69660747115854415882008-10-23T15:25:00.000-07:002008-10-23T15:29:44.869-07:00Sheesh, two weeks since I posted?How sad am I? More than two weeks of well meant intentions, great ideas and well thought out theses and I've managed to post nothing on this blog. Shame on me.<br /><br />I had tons to say. I wanted to write about the pressure to party on Halloween, especially with it happening on a Friday this week.<br /><br />I wanted to write about something going on at my job that is stretching my idealogy because I don't really agree with the stand my assocation is taking.<br /><br />I wanted to write about the difficulty in managing the pressures of competing priorities between freelance clients and the job.<br /><br />I wanted to write about my lack of comitment to excerzie since the triathlon and how my fitness and my weight are suffering.<br /><br />I wanted to write about the Gen X/Gen Y dynamic I'm living in my workplace.<br /><br />I wanted to write about the backroom-boys language and "joshing" I get with the two guys I work with the most.<br /><br />I wanted to write more often. Now that I've listed all my blog ideas, maybe I will.<br /><br />I hope.Carla S.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16966193633475725290noreply@blogger.com0